I asked Robyn how she thought everyone would react if I posted something philosophical on the blog, and she responded with a "it's your blog, write what you want." So, in light of the fact that I may not be able to post for a while (hopefully less than a week's absence) I thought I'd leave you with something to consider...
Quote: "Don't allow others to dictate your happiness, either negatively or positively." I tried to source a similar quote that is more eloquent, spoken by someone who was more employed than I am now, but I failed, so I improvised. That's me speaking there. I find it interesting that it's often easy to brush off negative opinions, but I'm still quick to ingest positive opinions of others.
Thought: Often, even when someone (person A) compliments another (person B), the topic of the conversation is still person A. Example: Rosanne: "Sherry, I like your dress." Even though Rosanne is complimenting Sherry, the conversation's really still about what Rosanne likes or dislikes. Most people provide compliments like this without even knowing it. It's a tough habit to break.
Question: Is someone who provides this advice, "Oh, don't pay any attention to his opinion, you're actually a really great person" a hypocrite?
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Oh yes, that critique of "I like..." is too self-centred. I think you might've told me that a few times when I was trying to be jovial with our colleagues. In return, my self confidence has been shredded, destroyed, smashed into smithereens. Yes, still about me, but a side-effect of your thought!
ReplyDeleteAnswer: Technically speaking anyone who makes the above statement can be defined as a hypocrite. They are in fact saying "Don't listen to him, listen to me," which is hypocritical. But in the context that you've used the example its quite obvious that whoever is speaking is actually consoling someone and should be forgiven for the hypocrisy.
ReplyDeleteHowever, to touch on your example of Rosanne, I would have to say that not only is it "a tough habit to break," its an impossible habit to break. Anything anyone says (or does, or thinks) is always grounded in the subjective. Even scientific knowledge, according to Kant, is systematic knowledge of the nature of things as they appear to us subjects rather than as they are in themselves. So, if all we can do is reference things from our point of view, than there really is no other way of doing anything, including complimenting someone. Which brings us full circle to your "Quote."
If the subjective is all we have, then "happiness", or "truth", is unique to the individual and as such must be found within. No external source can tell us what to do or who to be b/c no external source can truly understand who we are. We can use what others tell us as guide lines, ways to judge our own thoughts and decisions, but in the end we have to provide our own answers, our own happiness, and our own truth. Whether we do or not is entirely up to us...
Chris
Is that Chris Reid? What an great comment. Thanks for taking the time to share, and I agree wholeheartedly with your points.
ReplyDeleteGood times.